By the power of Yahweh ( and Snake ) the famous missing episodes are back!! Now collected into four volumes. Relive your wasted youth right here, right now. :) In the Vegan Line of Fire (self.thebakerverse) submitted 14 hours ago * by Avocadoeagle " Attention" " Company..." " March Forward!!!!" As the sharp command of Maj Vegan Gnome echoes through the parade ground, Nihilist Monkey raises his hands signaling the military band to start playing the marching tune. The military band now starts the "Ode to Mendes" national anthem and the military parade marches forward with Major Vegan Gnome leading from the front. Today, is the sad day, that residents of Painsville,AN will bury one of their bravest sons who died in the vegan line of fire. Captain Brocolli , special services brocolli commando, who during a valiant attempt in Operation Vegan Onslaught paid with his life, when he was accidentally squashed to death by a speeding car. The marching party now reaches the podium, where recipient of the Medal of Mendes and the Goat of Mendes special discount certificate, Field Marshall Angry Chicken awaits them. Major Vegan Gnome now shouts his command. " Attention !" ( All the Vegan soldiers now stand at attention...) Major Vegan Gnome now marches to the podium, as Field Marshall Angry Chicken arrives to receive his salute. Major Vegan Gnome and Field Marshall Angry Chicken meet. Major Vegan Gnome raises his Cucumber of honor and salutes the Field Marshall. " Field Marshall Angry Chicken..." " Vegan Force Unit 34-Pipe at your service Sir!" Field Marshall Angry Chicken acknowledges the salute. Nihilist Monkey now signals the military band to stop the music. It is now time to pay final respects to the brave broccoli commando. Field Marshall Angry Chicken now arrives at the lectern and addresses the crowd. " Pukaaak!" " Iz diz mic on...?!" asks the Field Marshall. ( A sharp shrill echo is heard in the parade ground, that forces many in the crowd to cover their ears...) " Pukak!" " Bitchez....." " We are gathered here ... to bid farewell to diz piece of vegetable paste... that died in the line of fire, when some azzhole drove over him and squished him into a vegan paste...." " Captain Brocolli never faltered in the line of Fire..." ( Field Marshall Angry Chicken bobs his bird head left and then right....) " He was a caring and responsible officer, devoted son and a man of honor..." " But...now he is just a pile of vegan paste...." "N he is dead..." " So fuck him...." Field Marshall Angry Chicken now looks at the sad crowd. He doesn't have words to describe his loss. Primarily because he has no more words to say. What do you say....? Field Marshall Angry Chicken now looks down at his thin bird legs and then stares into the distance. Hmmmm.... " Pukak...." " Bitchez...." " In his honor, I dedicate my poem Soi Boiz" The Field Marshall takes out his mobile phone, selects the right beat and puts his phone on speaker mode. Beat kicks in 3...2....1.... Chorus: Rubbin oil on dem titties... Rubbin oil on dem titties... Pukaaaaaak!!!! Yu.... juzt a Soi Boi... Cry all night... Hug yo teddy bear tight... In yo azz.... You crave a pipe... Cuz yu just a Soi boi.... N the only thing you like Izzzzzzz...... Rubbin oil on dem titties... Rubbin oil on dem titties... ( Field Marshall Angry Chicken now switches his beatbox app on his phone off with his thin bird leg...) ( Field Marshall Angry Chicken now clears his throat...) " Datz all folks...." " Pukaaaaak!" " We out of here....." As Field Marshall Angry Chicken runs away from the podium, Maj Vegan Gnome gives a loud command to the brave Vegan force. " Attention...." " Vegan Force.....Left turn...." " Forward March....!!!" Nihilist Monkey gives the cue and the marching band begins to play the new marching tune called " The Smile of The Great Goat " as the Vegan force party marches off. Even though the people in the crowd have tears in their eyes... they feel assured in their hearts that the sacrifices of the brave Captain Brocolli did not go in vain. Post Script: The sacrifice of Captain Brocolli did indeed go in vain. https://imgur.com/a/ptqeq Profiles in Courage (self.thebakerverse) submitted 42 minutes ago * by Avocadoeagle Admiral Gustav scratches his chin as he stares at the operational map for "Operation Turnip Redemption 3 - Day One". " Who made this plan?" asks Admiral Gustav in a serious tone to the Director General Military Plans (DGMP) Major General Mister Penis. Major General Mister Penis, a tall thin man with a bald head, immediately feels a terrible anxiety engulfing him. " Admiral Gustav, the plans have been approved by the Field Marshal himself.... who .... who.... made the battle plan himself... Sir!" Admiral Gustav takes off his reading glasses and places them on the operational map.The Admiral looks down at his polished shoes and then stares into the distance. " General Penis... you are telling me... that this plan... was made and approved by the Field Marshal..." General Penis feels beads of sweat rolling over his forehead. " Yes.... yes... Sir!" Admiral Gustav looks in General Penis's eyes. The nervousness is palpable. " You are telling me.... that this plan.... this rubbish shit plan.... of launching a strategic operation involving hundreds of spec ops vegan commandoes, aerial drones, joint strikes and C4I counter operations was made by a Chicken..." Admiral Gustav gets up from his chair and angrily points at the operational map. " What is this...." " Launch artillery strikes of Pineapples at 0600 Hrs, followed by an attack of men with male breasts, who will strike fear in the enemies hearts by rubbing oil over their man breasts and run naked into the enemies dug out trench areas...." " And this bit... in which a monkey will ride a dog into the thick of battle and deliver round house kicks to the enemies.... with Master Wang..." " And this .... this shit.... here.... where military attack helicopters will play " Soi Boi" on the speakers full blast so that the enemies can buy Xhixken MC's new rap album .....!" " What is this shit!" " You call this a military plan General ?!!!" " Never in my thirty five years of service have I ever come across...." ( The office door opens...) Field Marshal Angry Chicken walks in.... ( Major General Mister Penis immediately delivers a sharp salute to the Field Marshal...) " Pukaaaak!" "I was hearing you bitichin ...Admiral..." Admiral Gustav immediately loses his cool. " Day One Mission Planning for Operation Turnip Redemption 3 is a disaster Field Marshal...how could you even...." " Shat the faaaak up biatch..." " You don't even know what we have in store for you on Day Two Boiii...." shouts the Field Marshal. Admiral Gustav is confused. He looks at Major General Mister Penis. " General Penis..." " What is in store for me on Day Two...?" General Penis nervously looks left and then right. Then he takes a sip of cold milk from a glass and clears his throat. The Admiral is clearly inflamed. " General Penis... you are not answering my question...!" thunders Admiral Gustav. " What is in store for me on Day Two???!!!" Major General Mister Penis, takes in a deep breath. " Sir... the Field Marshal...." " The Field Marshal has ordered that you are to be fired from a torpedo canon naked into the enemies defense lines, first thing on Day Two...." " He has said WHAT......?!!!!!" shouts Prince Gustav clearly dumbfounded by the revelation. Major General Mister Penis can't take the anxiety anymore. He bends down and vomits milk from his mouth. Post Script: A gush of milk is seen being vomited by General Penis on the carpet. https://imgur.com/a/DaopN On The Edge of Hope (self.thebakerverse) submitted 49 minutes ago * by Avocadoeagle " Snake.... come here..." " Come here quick...." shouts Yahweh as he sits down in front of his TV. Snake is busy making pancakes. Breaking News! ( News anchor voice...) "We have information that Vegan Force is initiating Operation Turnip Redemption 3 against Teeth Whitening Turds (TWT), who have been implicated in the death of Captain Brocolli who succumbed to his vegan injuries in Operation Vegan Onslaught, three days back." " Continue watching live coverage of Operation Turnip Redemption 3 with your most trustworthy fake news channel PNN..." Snake rushes in. " Sssss....What do you want God... ?" " Do you want whipping cream with your pancakessss?" " Snake sit down here..." says Yahweh, without even moving his eyes off the TV set. Breaking News: ( News anchor voice...) " PNN has just learned that Field Marshal Angry Chicken has decided to overwhelm the teeth whitening turds with a shock N awe display of man titties, organic pineapples and bombarding the enemies with his latest rap songs played by attack helicopters..." Yahweh has a strange look on his face. " What the fuck did I just hear.... Mr Chicken is doing WHAT?!" Snake takes a sip of his lemonade. " Ssss.... God it's called doublespeak. Attack the wrong people for the wrong reasons with the wrong tactics for a fake purpose and then declare mission accomplished. All civilized nations have engaged in BS wars over the years.... itssss good business!" Yahweh shakes his head as he sees the live coverage on the TV screen. "This has to be the dumbest thing that I have ever seen Snake...." says Yahweh. Snake takes another sip of his lemonade and then stares into the distance. " God.... it is still not as dumb as creating sentient beings on a ball of pain, in a dog eat dog world , where every animal is feasting on one another.... and enslaving all these wretched beings with intense sexual appetites , so that their miseries continue on for ever through their children..." says Snake. Yahweh looks at Snake. " Hmmmmm.... that truly is an even more dumber thing than this.... whoever did that Snake?" asks Yahweh. " You did...." says Snake as he continues staring into the distance. https://imgur.com/a/4gOOc Executive Vegan Decisions (self.thebakerverse) submitted just now * by Avocadoeagle General Big Pieep Sahulo, Rear Admiral Bong Piep Mabuto and Air Marshal Lingus Moseko stand up in attention and salute as Field Marshall Angry Chicken enters the Operations Commander's Board room. Admiral Gustav follows the Field Marshal along with DGMP (Director General Military Plans) Major General Mister Penis. " Genelmen... take yo seatz..." " Pukak..." says the Field Marshal, as he sits down at the Principal seat. Everyone takes their seats on the board room table and Major General Penis distributes mission briefs to all General officers. " Genelmen...!" " Today we begin day one of Operation Turnip Redemption 3..." " I wud personally like to thank President Mugabe for lending me his finest officers, who have extensive experience, accumulated over decades of military service,in eating Cheetos and chugging Mountain Dews..." " Genelmen... any questionz?" asks the Field Marshal. Rear Admiral Bongo Piep Mobutu, looks at the other officers and then raises his hand. " Sir wat about the mission name..." " We think that Operation Turnip Redemption 3 is too harsh a name for an operation of this scale..." says the Rear Admiral in a thick African accent. Field Marshal Chicken is intrigued by the suggestion. " Pukaaak..." " So what do you Gz have in mind...?!" General Big Piep Sahulo looks at Air Marshal Lingus Moseko and then raises his hand. " Yes General Big Piep..." says the Field Marshal. " Sir weee have decided on two other names, which will fit the mission better and want you to decide which one to select..." says the General in a thick African accent. " Go ahead..." says Field Marshal Angry Chicken. Air Marshal Lingus Moseko gets up from his seat. " Field Marshal Chicken, the two names we have considered are "Operation Pipe in Azz/ Smile on Face" or "Operation Pipe in Azz... Ohh Fuk... I lost all my savings in Bitcoin...!" Field Marshal Angry Chicken listens to the suggestions made by the General officers. Time is running out.... Which name to take.... Decisions...decisions... decisions...! Things look tense👀...in the Operation Commander's Board Room. https://imgur.com/a/tRluu The Canopus of Vegan Sin (self.thebakerverse) submitted 1 day ago * by Avocadoeagle Vegan Gnome always looks forward to 8:30 pm. It's that time of the night , when he places his sweet Christian butt cheeks on his toilet seat and takes a *vegan shit. ( * USDA approved - Organic Vegan Shit) He also likes to solve cheeky vegan puzzles while he defecates. Puzzle 32 F: " What has two i's, two f's, walks and talks and loves your mother ?" Mmmmm.... Vegan Gnome thinks for a few seconds. Aha....he got it.. " It's a woolly cashmere sweater.." says Vegan Gnome as he claps his hands in delight. He goes to the answers page, at the end of the book. Wrong Answer🍑🥕! He reads the answer: " The answer to puzzle 32 F is a vicious vegan alien from the Super Giant star Canopus in the constellation Carina, 310 light years away, who will come to earth and shove his fist right up your azz!" Fak! No worries.... Vegan Gnome turns over the page and now tries to solve puzzle 36 DD. " My name begins with a Q , I walk on two legs, and can catch a bird, fly and write rhymes, what am I ?" This one is difficult. Vegan Gnome strains hard for this one. Maybe.... Mmmmm..... Aha.... " It's the village postman !" says Vegan Gnome as he claps his hands in delight. He hurriedly goes to the answers page at the end of the book. Puzzle 36 DD. Wrong Answer🌰🌶! He reads the answer: " The answer to puzzle 36 DD, is Q-Zord, a vicious sodomite alien from the constellation Carina, who is coming to earth this very moment on the space battleship Zordus, to shove his entire three fingered alien fist up your vegan azz!" Fak! ( A few moments later...) Vegan Gnome tucks himself into bed and gives Teddy a kiss. He switches off his bed side lamp. " Isn't life wonderful..." thinks Vegan Gnome as he drifts into sleep with a smile on his face. Post Script: 23:49 Hrs. Strange flashes of light are seen in the sky. The dogs in the neighborhood have started barking... https://imgur.com/a/L3Bie This Cursed Jealousy (self.thebakerverse) submitted 18 minutes ago by Avocadoeagle Skeletor is 6'3. He has 23 inch biceps and 6 pack abs. He has a square chiseled jaw ( Quite literally ). All the chics dig Skeletor. Skeletor is also a great shooting guard for Eternia's High School Basketball team. Chic's love Skeletor. Mumraa looks at his reflection in the putrid pool near his skull coffin. Fak! Bad dental hygiene. Man tits. Weak muscles. Bad posture. Weak eyesight. Can't even walk straight. Incel. Women hate him. No access to titties. Mumraa takes in a deep breath. Everyone tells him to lift bro...and be more confident around women, but he knows that doesn't work. He adopted a vegan lifestyle, workout out, went out for long walks with Mamut, did deep breathing exercises, yoga, Taichi, Gingseng Tea, protein shakes.... Fak! None of these shits help. Mumraa looks at his G shock watch. It's 9 am in the morning. Time to go back to sleep, as Mumraa stays awake all night watching reruns of " Full House" with Mamut. Mumraa is lonely, Fak Skeletor! Post Script: " Field Marshal do we have permission...?" asks Commodore Piep. Field Marshal Chicken nods his head. Admiral Gustav is fired from the torpedo tube of a submarine straight into enemy territory. A naked old man can be seen flying over the black pyramid, where Mumraa is changing into his pygamies and getting ready to sleep. https://imgur.com/a/GM5ou
Tommy Chong Interview on incarceration and cancer - how cannabis helped.
Tommy Chong has been around so long that he’s a cannabis icon, not just to baby boomers who fondly remember the Cheech and Chong albums and movies, but also to the zillions of fans of That 70s Show, where he starred as Leo (an old hippie who sells weed1). More recently, Chong appeared on Dancing With The Stars, as well as doing voice acting in animated TV shows and even children’s films (Ferngully: The Last Rainforest and Zootopia) over the decades. While some of today’s cannabis activists have derided the Cheech and Chong culture because of their perpetuation of negative stereotypes, it’s important to remember that those albums and movies were all for fun, and that – at the time – those stereotypes did not even exist. While prohibitionists have indeed attempted to use Cheech and Chong movies as “proof that stoners are lazy and stupid”, the joke’s really on them: Cheech and Chong are actors, no matter how much marijuana they smoked in real life, and “Up In Smoke” is no more a documentary of stoners than “Airplane!” represents a true look at life in airline cockpits. Few news stories have made it clear, but Tommy Chong is a quiet hero who chose to go to federal prison in 2003 to protect his family. From Wikipedia (emphasis ours): In 2003 Chong became caught up in two American investigations, code-named Operation Pipe Dreams and Operation Headhunter, which tried to trace drug traffic and users through businesses selling drug paraphernalia, mostly bongs. Operation Pipe Dream was run from Pittsburgh. US Attorney for Western Pennsylvania Mary Beth Buchanan oversaw the case. The estimated cost of Operation Pipe Dream was over $12 million and included the resources of 2,000 law enforcement officers. Fifty-five companies that sold drug paraphernalia over the Internet were the subject of the investigation, and Nice Dreams was one of them. Chong was charged for his part in financing and promoting Chong Glass/Nice Dreams, a company started by his son Paris. His case never went to trial, as his attorney negotiated a plea agreement with the US Attorney for the Western District of Pennsylvania’s Office. He admitted to distributing 7,500 bongs and water pipes on the Internet through Nice Dreams, a family company. Chong agreed to plead guilty to one count of conspiracy to distribute drug paraphernalia in exchange for non-prosecution of his wife, Shelby, and his son, Paris. Chong cooperated with the government and was the first of the Operation Pipe Dreams defendants to plead guilty. Then we have Chong’s incarceration and cancer. In the interview, Tommy talks about the prison that was built over oil fields, and that’s true, but it understates the case. The entire town of Taft, where the prison is located, is actually located over the oil fields, as well as several nearby towns. When you factor in the toxic waste dump, it’s easier to understand why lots of people in that area have become suspicious that it was located in a poor Hispanic area, and why many babies have died or been born with mortal defects there. By the way, here’s where the prison is located, and here’s the dump. You can easily zoom out, and turn the satellite/Google Earth data on, and see how the dump is right up the valley from the prison, so that the air will blow straight down there under the right conditions. The facts revealed in this interview will likely surprise and even upset some people, but it’s good to remember that Tommy Chong is still with us, and that there are undoubtedly few people on the planet as committed to cannabis as he is. – DF Tommy Chong smokingTC: This is Tommy Chong speaking. OH: Hello Mr. Tommy Chong! How are you? TC: I’m very well, thank you. How are you? OH: Okay! I’m really happy to talk to you for Beyond Chronic today. First of all…how is your health, man? TC: Good! Yeah, I just got a clean bill. Just had my blood test, everything’s good, looks like I’m cancer-free at the moment., so that’s good news. OH: That’s awesome news! Since we’re mostly a medical website, can you give us some details about how you were using cannabis for your cancer and when you started using it medically? TC: Well, I’ve been using cannabis, you know, for many, many years now, over 50 years. And I’m not a huge smoker, but I smoke it when I got it, you know, one of those kind of guys. A few years ago, I got put in [prison] for bongs…that was in ’03. And I think that’s where the cancer started, because the [prison] was built near a toxic waste dump near Bakersfield, over an old oil field, where they used to hold the oil. And they have a thing there called “Valley Fever“, which is a wasting disease. When I was incarcerated, every time the wind blew, they would make all the inmates go inside because of the bad quality of the air. And so it was during that time, you know, when I got out of jail, then I started having symptoms and then I went to the doctor, and I found out I had prostate cancer. It’s a slow-acting cancer, so after a biopsy and a few consultations with different experts, we decided to not do anything. And then move forward to around 2013 or 2014, I got asked to be on a show called Dancing With The Stars, and it was physically very taxing, a lot of stress. And I think that’s where I contracted the cancer of the rectum. And up until then, for my prostate cancer, I was doing a very holistic diet, you know. A lot of green, a lot of vegetables. I quit eating meat, I quit drinking alcohol, and I think it helped. But when I was diagnosed with the rectal cancer, that was right after Dancing With The Stars. I had a choice of going strictly with the cannabis – which I was talked out of. I have a lot of friends who are doctors, and they talked me out of it. They said that no one has survived rectal cancer with marijuana. So then I opted for the operation, and the chemo treatment, and the radiation…as well as the cannabis. Now, I think more than anything, the cannabis has helped me heal, because once I was operated on – you know, it was a five hour operation – and they closed off the rectum, and they gave me a colostomy bag. And I lost some 30-odd pounds, almost 40 pounds. So I was quite skinny. I went down to almost 130. And so I ended up coming back from that. TC: And so right after the operation, as soon as I got home, I got off the hard drugs and I got on to the marijuana. And it helped me right off the bat. I had no appetite in the hospital; that’s where I lost all my weight. But as soon as I got home and started smoking pot, I got my appetite back. And then the other thing I learned while I was recovering in the hospital: I was in a lot of…discomfort, you know, from laying immobile for 5 hours while they operated on me, and then laying on my back after that to recover. And so I asked the doctor if it was OK if I did crunches, you know, like abdominal work. Because I could do that, I could do planks, I could do a lot of exercises laying on my back. And the doctor gave me the green light. So I would spend a great deal of my time doing crunches, and ab work, and working up a nice sweat. And so I think that really helped with my recovery, because it was within a month that I was walking and playing golf and getting back all the weight I’d lost. And now, like I said, I’m cancer-free. I was injecting some cannabis oil right after the operation, to help with my healing. But that’s untested, and I stopped doing it, because I was a little worried about injecting anything in my body without knowing exactly where it came from, and everything. I smoke a little pot, every day, and I’m healthy as can be. I just finished a golf tournament yesterday, and I did the whole 18 holes. I need to rest quite a bit, you know. Whenever I do anything, I need to take 15 or 20 minutes, maybe longer, to regroup. But I’m dancing tango, and I’m playing golf, and I’m quite active, you know, and for my age and everything, and what I’ve gone through, I’m very happy. And I look good. I can not only do that workout, but I can do upper and lower body workouts with weights. In fact, I’m working on an exerciser that’s going to be on the market, for old people. For guys like me that have limited abilities to work out and stay in shape. More than anything, the weed really helped with my mental state, because marijuana works on the brain. And if anything, it soothes the brain. You know that old joke about potheads having bad memories? Well, the bad memories are like pain, discomfort, and fear. So you lose all that, and the body reacts by healing faster and stronger. Tommy ChongOH: Wow (long pause, because this was pretty heavy). Well, I’m really glad to hear you’re better, because when I heard the cancer came back, it sounded pretty dire. So this is very good news. TC: Yeah! In fact, a lot of websites had me [as] dead. OH: Well, all these guys are trying to make money off of any damn thing, you know. TC: (laughs) Yeah, yeah, that’s a lot of hits, isn’t it? OH: Yeah, I wasn’t even going to bring up what happened to you in 2003, because you really got railroaded on that one.1 TC: Well, I have no real proof on that, but my wife and I both agreed that I was healthy when I went in, and unhealthy when I came out, so that’s the only conclusion we could reach. Although the diet was good. I had a special friend, you know, that worked the garden, we had our own garden, so I was eating healthy. But it was just the atmosphere that I was around, that toxic waste dump that they built the prison on, I’m quite sure that had an effect. OH: Oh, yeah. And also, just being in there is so much stress, even if you weren’t in one of those nasty prisons where guards beat the shit out of people, it’s still very bad for your whole approach to life when you’re sitting there in a cage like that. TC: It can be. You know, I actually turned it into a religious retreat, because we were allowed to…well, if you kept your nose clean and you behaved yourself, you had a lot of freedoms. Because it was minimum security; “Camp Cupcake”, we called it. It’s a Bernie Madoff kind of prison. And I was treated like a celebrity, so I never had that kind of stress. But the stress on my family…my wife having to fend for herself in this world…and that [eventually] worked out really well. But having the federal government come after you for something as innocuous as water pipes, you know…that was a little much. George Bush, he paid the price. He’s in disgrace now, so the karma really came back on those guys. And [as far as] the cancer…I look on everything with a very optimistic eye. Because I’m a body builder by trade, you know, that was my intent all my life. As soon as I discovered weightlifting, all I wanted to do – my plan in life – was to work out, lay on the beach, and get high…smoke dope. And that’s really what I’m doing. OH: Well, that brings up another idea…the election couldn’t get much crazier. Have you thought of running for president? TC: (laughs) Well, first of all, I’m not American-born, so I couldn’t pass that test. What I did, I endorsed Bernie Sanders, but you know, my take on the election is that I lived through Nixon and Reagan. We survived Nixon and Reagan and George Bush, and so we can survive anything that comes along. But I really sincerely believe that Donald Trump and the Clintons made a deal, and Trump said, “Don’t worry, I’ll get you elected. Just watch me.” OH: Well, it’s pretty crazy out there, that’s for sure. So your name is synonymous with smoking, but because you’ve been very concerned about your health, I was wondering whether you use a vaporizer at all. TC: I use a bong. I kind of came up with my own bong made out of kombucha bottles. You know, there’s a kombucha that I really like, it’s a fermented drink that they sell in Whole Foods. And the bottle makes a perfect water pipe, because you can take it apart and clean it real easy. So my preferred method of ingesting my medicine is the Tommy Chong Not-A-Bong. I don’t call them “bongs”, because they’re more like art pieces. Just before I got busted, I had an art show with my bongs, and I called them art, and the Feds never touched me! (both laugh) OH: Man…you just can’t really get into their heads. They’re in some other world. All of us heads from the 60s kind of gave up on legalization back in the 70s after NORML screwed the pooch with that crazy shit that went on. So what can you say now that it’s finally starting to happen? TC: Well, you know, everything takes time. There’s a big shift in our whole way of living, and it started maybe 10 years ago when [smartphones] came into existence. Up until then, we were at the mercy of the press, and so-called experts that would tell us what to think and how to think. But now the [smartphone] has freed everybody, and so everybody gets better. No matter what you say, people will check you out on their phone. My take is that legalization [started coming about] because of that. So, because they found out that marijuana works well on little babies with epilepsy, Sanjay Gupta of CNN did a big report on that. And when they found out that marijuana does have medical uses, it debunked all the myths and all the lies that the establishment had spread around about marijuana. Marijuana: The New Bitcoin? And so the policies have to change, because everything is exposed. We see the corrupt prison system, we see the corrupt police system, we see the corruption in the government, from the top on down. You know, it’s built based on lies. However, the marijuana industry itself, because it was an underground industry, showed us the way we could exist on this planet. Because marijuana has become like currency. Anytime you grow a crop like marijuana, or wheat, or corn, or anything that people consume on a daily basis, you’re [getting] into a huge economic area. By making marijuana illegal, the agricultural people can’t grab hold of it like they did with corn and wheat. So those companies are scrambling around trying to get hold of it, but they can’t, because it’s a cottage industry, and it will always be a cottage industry. Because the minute the big companies try to make it their own, like they did with soybeans…like Monsanto, they put their own patent on seeds, and you can’t do that with marijuana. And it grows everywhere in the world. And it really is currency, if you think about it. Like when Mexicans sneak across the border, they’re more apt to carry a bag of pot then they are a fistful of money. Because the pot can be exchanged for money, anywhere in America. Anywhere in the world! You got a bag of pot, there’s someone who wants to buy it from you. So in a weird way, marijuana has [become] and is becoming the new currency of the world. OH: I know some people like Bitcoin, and some people like good seeds, right? TC: (laughs) Yeah! You can smoke it, you can eat it, you can wear it, it’s a perfect plant! OH: I’d love to talk to you all day about weed, but your PR people really want me to ask about your new emoji app. TC: Well, the emoji…there again, it’s like Bitcoin. It’s a way of selling my brand, with a very easy price on people. But it’s my brand, it’s my signature, it’s who I am. My emojis are spreading around the world very quickly, and people are picking up on them. OH: It’s very cool. TC: Yeah, they’re very cool. I think I’m the first to do weed-friendly emoji. OH: What about your Chong’s Choice strains? TC: How Chong’s Choice came about…we were approached by people who wanted to do strains. Like there’s a strain out in Colorado called the Chong Star, after Dancing With The Stars. But that’s only one strain. And what we did was we got a business partner who came in and put a distribution center for us: Chong’s Choice. All the top growers in the different states, they contact us and we make sure that they’re vetted, that what they grow is the best. And once we find the good growers, then we put our brand and packaging on it, and it hits all the dispensaries, and eventually it’ll be hitting the public, as the laws change. But right now, like the Marlboro Man, I’m gonna have the Chong’s Choice brand for pot. OH: And who better, right? TC: Who better?! OH: Yeah! And it’s 4:20, man. It’s 4:20 PM and I’m talking to you. It’s great. TC: Isn’t it great? Yeah! Something good always happens at 4:20 for me. OH: Well, I don’t want to keep you. I just want to say…thanks for being you. TC: (laughs) Oh, you’re welcome, my friend. Call me any time. OH: Thanks…and here’s my catchphrase: Nugs and hugs! TC: Ha, nugs and hugs, I love that. Take care. OH: Thank you! This was shared with us at /CBD by the owners of www.beyondchronic.com. We talked with them, and they were willing to let us put the article on here completely. They are a great site, and have good articles. This was the full interview. Read more about it here. http://beyondchronic.com/2016/06/tommy-chong-beyond-chronic-interview-part-one/
This is an open thread to discuss items of interest. I may also use it to drop thoughts as they occur to me as well -- something of a replacement of my former "tab closure" posts, as ... well, it seems tabs are simply running away from me. Consider this an experiment that's been mulling for some time. If you've got a question, observation, link, or anything else, feel free to post it, with a thought to the lair rules -- like house rules, but larrier. An evolving conversation....
The patient continued, “You understand that the many tests and the elusive information of the recent weeks remind me of Franz Kafka's words in his famous work Der Prozess, meaning both trial and process.” “The verdict does not come suddenly, proceedings continue until a verdict is reached gradually.”
I am looking for tools to make sense of HTML DOMs
On nuclear power and safety
There's an article making the rounds, poorly argued, IMO, extolling nuclear energy. I've been heartened by the critical response it's triggered at Hacker News, including my own contribution, previously submitted at G+ on Joerg Fliege's thread, drawing comparisons to the Banqiao Dam disaster of 1975. In part:
Proponents of nuclear power assume that we can assess risks with tails not of the decade or so of Banqiao, but of 100, 1,000, 1 million years. Utterly outside the scope of any human institutions, or of the human species itself. Our models of risks and of costs fail us.... The problems with nuclear power are massive, long-tailed, systemic and potentially existential. The same cannot be said of a wind farm or solar array. There is no significant 10,000 year threat from wind power, or solar power. We're not risking 30 - 60 km exclusion zones, on an unplanned basis, of which we've created at least four in the half-decade of significant nuclear energy applications: Hanford, Washington, Three Mile Island, Pennsyvania, Chernobyl, Ukraine, and Fukushima, Japan. And this is with a global plant of some 450 operating nuclear power plants as of 2017.... If the total experience has been, say, 500 reactors, over 50 years, or 25,000 reactor-years of experience, and we've experienced at least four major disasters, then our failure rate is 0.016%. The global share of nuclear power generation in 2012 was about 10%. Which means that without allowing for increased electrical consumption within existing or extending to developing nations, the plant count would have to increase tenfold. Holding the reactor-year failure rate constant would mean 80 core meltdowns per century. Reducing that to the present rate of four meltdowns/century would require reducing the failure rate to 0.0008%. That's five nines, if anyone's counting. Five nines on a process involving weather, politics, business, social upheaval, terrorism, sabotage, individual psychology, group psychology, climate, communications, response, preparedness....
David Gerard at the Financial Times on Bitcoin and Blockchain
David Gerard, author of Attack of the 50 Foot Blockchain, interviewed by Izabella Kaminska about Bitcoin, /Buttcoin, and Tulips, among other topics. There's a bunch of great information in this podcast, of which I'll highlight two items in particular. I've been reflecting a great deal on information, truth, and that boundary between information and belief, most principally trust. Gerard nails the value proposition of trust, and a problem with the Free All the Things trope of decentralisation:
Decentralisation is the paramount feature in bitcoin, but it turns out that that's a bad idea that's really, really expensive, because it turns out that a tiny bit of trust saves you a fortune. "Decentralised" isn't a useful buzzword in a lot of ways, because it turns out that you want to be a part of society.
He also points at the invalidity of market capitalisation as a concept. It's an arithmetically inexpensive value to obtain (multiply total quantity by present price), but, especially in the thin markets typical of Bitcoin, it is essentially a fantasy value with no real meaning. From a conversation at The Other Place:
[C]rypto "market cap" is a meaningless number. Even on Bitcoin, the most popular one, about 100 BTC will clear the order book on any exchange. Crypto "market cap" is not a number you could realise, it's not how much money went into it, it's not anything useful. If you want to compare cryptos by interest, you'd need to measure daily trading volumes, which is a harder number to gather, and market cap doesn't turn out to be a good proxy for it. So billions of dollars in free money weren't actually just created - instead it's millions of tokens that may or may not be tradeable for ordinary bitcoins or for cash, if you don't go very fast at all.
This evokes my own explorations of cost, price, and value, and what exactly they mean. One analogy that Gerard, Alex Kudlick, and I are leaning toward is that of electric circuits. Price is analogous to pressure, or potential (voltage). Volume would be current. This raises the question of what resistance, capacitance, and impedance would have as analogues.... FT: Attack of the 50 Foot Blockchain with David Gerard (Soundcloud: 65 minutes). Highly recommended. And you'll find Gerard on Reddit as dgerard.
Yonatan Zunger on the evolution of U.S. "court costs"
In "The history of “court costs”", Zunger writes of "a system that [you might think] has gone out of control, a mechanism that started with a good purpose that got eaten by corruption and incompetence. But you would be wrong."
In the post-Civil War South, a system came up when plantations, factories, or mines needed workers. It was based on that clever little exception in the 13th Amendment:
Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.
Note that it doesn’t say what kind of crime you have to be convicted of.
The short of it: slavery is not illegal in the United States, just somewhat regulated. My own main commentary ... probably worth posting in its own right, is that whilst Zunger raises excellent points about the intentionality of this system and its antecedents to Nazi Germany's concentration camps, the fact is that none of these phenomena are particularly American, nor particularly new. This isn't to excuse the United States of its guilt. Rather: these behaviours, systems, and dynamics seem to be deeply rooted. Whether they're merely cultural (the examples I've given are all from cultural antecedants or siblings to US tradition), part of human behavioral psychology, or deeper even than that, this is not simply a matter of bad laws and bad people. Rather: It is a case of such rules and dynamics actively succeeding and crowding out alternatives. There are two good discussions at The Other Place from the original Tootstorm and from the Medium essay.
When your political opponents are made of money ...
In politics, a growing problem is the dominance of interests who apparently have nothing but money to throw at problems Utilising this fact in judo fashion, the thought occurs that that one possible response is to create a vast wall of problems for which they find it necessary to throw money at. The less ease with which to discern between actual problems and fantasmic simaculra of problems, so much the better. Have fun storming the castle!
Bill Browder: "It turned out that in Putin's Russia, there are no good guys."
In what one senator called one of the Senate Judiciary Committee's "most important" hearings, [William] Browder, a wealthy businessman-turned-activist-turned Putin-adversary shed a chilling new light on a Russian system of government that operates ruthlessly in the shadows — as Browder described it for lawmakers: a "kleptocracy" sustained by corruption, blackmail, torture and murder with Putin at its center. "Effectively the moment that you enter into their world," Browder told senators investigating Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election, "you become theirs."
Oh, and "Russian adoptions" are one of the dog whistles for the Magnitsky Act, legislation passed in the U.S. in 2012, named after Browder's now-murdered Russian lawyer, Sergei Magnitski, imposing sanctions on human-rights violators. Also the topic of a certain July, 2016 meeting featuring Donald Trump, Jr., and senior members of the Trump campaign, of recent memory.
The distinction isn't "online vs. offline" but "direct vs. mediated"
Articles and books on the impacts of digital and mobile media are a dime a dozen, and may be as laughable, or prophetic, as previous gerimiads on new media. "Has the Smartphone Destroyed a Generation" is fairly typical of the genre, if better than most. Reading it, a thought recurs to me: the distinction isn't of online vs. offline, but or even screen time, but of mediated vs. direct experience. Mediamediates. It is literally that which is between the observer and the observed. And with increasingly smart media, those exchanges are very directly mediated, interposed, by third (and fourth, and fifth, and ...) parties. This has multiple effects, a few:
Direct is present, mediated is (often) remote.
Direct is strongly causaul and deterministics, mediated is fuzzy, indistinct, and often capricious, failing in unanticipated, or inconsistent, ways.
Direct is filtered by location, mediated is filtered by selection -- your's or another's.
Direct is attentive, mediated is amplified.
I'd argue there are degrees of mediation as well. Analogue devices such as the telephone are less mediated than digital feeds such as Facebook or YouTube. And this isn't the first period to have such experiences. I have frequent cause to point out that intellectual, academic, and creative experiences were very often epistolary, exchanges of letters. Though generally with less rapidity than today's 'round-the-world-in-a-second emails. But that whole "online" and "cyberspace" distinction? Lose it.
The etymology of "data" ... peculiarly uninformative
I'm rather the fan of looking at etymologies of words. They often reveal interesting origins, connections, or evolutions. The etymology of data would be a peculiar exception:
1640s, classical plural of datum, from Latin datum "(thing) given," neuter past participle of dare "to give" (from PIE root *do- "to give"). Meaning "transmittable and storable computer information" first recorded 1946. Data processing is from 1954.
a collection of facts, observations, or other information related to a particular question or problem; as, the historical data show that the budget deficit is only a small factor in determining interest rates.
Which raises the question of whether data is the collection of facts, or the symbolic or other representation of those facts. Arising as discovered that there is a philosophy of data and I've encountered its philosopher, Brian Ballsun-Stanton (via Mastodon).
Amathia: Unteachably stupid
There are a few concepts on the harm or danger of stupidity. In "One Crucial Word", Massimo Pigliucci explores the Greek term Amathia:
Amathia. It is often translated as “ignorance,” as in the following two famous quotes from Socrates: “Wisdom alone, is the good for man, ignorance the only evil” (Euthydemus 281d) “There is, he said, only one good, that is, knowledge, and only one evil, that is, ignorance” (in Diogenes Laertius, II.31) But just as in the case of other ancient Greek words (like “eudaimonia,” about which I will write later this week) the common translation hardly does the job, and indeed often leads people to misunderstand the concept and quickly dismiss it as “obviously” false, or even incoherent....
Stupidity is a more dangerous enemy of the good than malice. One may protest against evil; it can be exposed and, if need be, prevented by use of force. Evil always carries within itself the germ of its own subversion in that it leaves behind in human beings at least a sense of unease. Against stupidity we are defenseless. Neither protests nor the use of force accomplish anything here; reasons fall on deaf ears; facts that contradict one’s prejudgment simply need not be believed- in such moments the stupid person even becomes critical – and when facts are irrefutable they are just pushed aside as inconsequential, as incidental. In all this the stupid person, in contrast to the malicious one, is utterly self-satisfied and, being easily irritated, becomes dangerous by going on the attack. For that reason, greater caution is called for than with a malicious one. Never again will we try to persuade the stupid person with reasons, for it is senseless and dangerous....
Read through to the source for the full quote. I've dug a bit deeper into the backstory. Dietrich Bonhoeffer was a contemporary and friend of Reinhold Neibur, of "Serenity Prayer" fame. He served in the Abwehr, the Nazi intelligence service, during WWII, headed by Wilhelm Canaris. Bonhoeffer and Caneris were executed by the Nazi regime on 9 April, 1945, only three weeks before the fall of Berlin and Hitler's own death. And it turns out that the Abwehr, centre of relatively unfiltered information during the regime, was an active centre of resistance to it, from within. Bonhoeffer was one of eight children. A brother, and the husbands of two of his sisters, were also executed by the Nazi regime. Bonhoeffer's twin sister Sabine survived until 1999. Strongly related to the previous item on amathia, and observations from Hanah Arendt.
The Edge Question, 2017
"What Scientific Term or Concept Ought to be More Widely Known?" I find The Edge to be a bit hit-or-miss, and there are some misses here. But there's a heck of a lot of hits on topics that have been floating through my brain-space, and a few names I've been following as well. David Christian ("Big History"), confirmation bias, motivated reasoning, networks, information pathology, ... Daily Nous has a promising list as well. I've got the essays lined up to ... hopefully, read. And this note as a reminder to do that.
There seems to be no little need that the whole doctrine of non-interference with foreign nations should be reconsidered, if it can be said to have as yet been considered as a really moral question at all... To go to war for an idea, if the war is aggressive, not defensive, is as criminal as to go to war for territory or revenue; for it is as little justifiable to force our ideas on other people, as to compel them to submit to our will in any other respect. But there assuredly are cases in which it is allowable to go to war, without having been ourselves attacked, or threatened with attack; and it is very important that nations should make up their minds in time, as to what these cases are... To suppose that the same international customs, and the same rules of international morality, can obtain between one civilized nation and another, and between civilized nations and barbarians, is a grave error...
Oil is other people's money
I was thinking through the history of the Indiana natural gas boom -- oh, yeah, what Indiana gas boom, you ask? ThisIndiana gas boom, lasting from about 1884 to 1903. Basically, people realised you could stick a pipe in the ground and burn what came out. Which people did. As free-standing, natural-wonder flambeaux -- flaming torches, visible for miles around. After all, such a God-given abundance would surely last forever, right? The field burned out, literally, in two decades. But why waste that resource? I'm thinking of a typical Analyst's Matrix, describing spending your own, vs. other people's money. Let's do that in a table:
Someone else's money
High quality / Low cost
High quality / Cost irrelevant
Somebody else's use
Quality irrelevant / Low cost
Quality irrelevant / Cost irrelevant
When it comes to natural gas, or oil, or coal, the majority of the cost, that is, its initial formation is not borne by you. Only the extraction cost is. That un-borne fraction is effectively other people's money. You care about the quality of the use (its use value), but not the full formation cost. Oil, coal, and gas, are other people's money. The legacy of the Indiana boom lives on in a few ways. Ball Glass Company originally formed in the state to take advantage of cheap gas for glass blowing, as did numerous other manufacturing concerns. They eventually shifted to coal. And you'll find the word flambeau turning up in place-names and the odd company name to. Relics to other people's money.
Limitations on Free Speech -- revisiting "shouting 'No Fire!' in a theatre that is in fact on fire"
The dynamics since the American Fascists riots in Charlottesville, VA, and the ACLU reconsidering its position on free speech reminds me that I had started, quite uncomfortably, revisiting my own views on this about three years ago. "Shouting "No Fire" in a Warming World as a Clear and Present Danger" was my thinking at the time. Further developments -- Charlie Hebdo attacks, "punching vs. punching down", questions over revisionist history, the amazingly good two-part YouTube set by Contrapoints: "Does the Left Hate Free Speech? (Part 1)" (video: 16:53) and "Does the Left Hate Free Speech? (Part 2)" (video: 17:46) (I'm surprised I hadn't already mentioned it), various research (Jill Gordon, "John Stuart Mill and 'The Marketplace of Ideas'" and Jill Lepore (Kansas City Public Library lecture) both address parts of this. Karl Popper's "Paradox of Tolerance". Many, many discussions, mostly on G+. The history of free expression / free speech itself is interesting and surprising, particularly the role between Protestant and Catholic factions -- the latter being seen much the same way as Fascists are today, as constitutionally opposed to tolerance, and therefore not subject to the benefits of free speech themselves.
Jeff Schmidt on salaried professionals and the soul-battering system that shapes their lives
This book explains the social agenda of the process of professional training. Disciplined Minds shows how it is used to promote orthodoxy by detecting and weeding out dissident candidates and by exerting pressure on the rest to obey their instructors and abandon personal agendas such as social reform -- so that they, in turn, can perpetuate the system by squeezing the life out of the next generation.
So no, Sonos! Palindromic boycott of privacy-skewering IoT ToS change
Wireless, cloud-connected speaker manufacturer Sonos have retroactively changed terms of serviceand required existing product ownersmonitoring subjects accept the new terms or the devices will cease to function. And this, boys and girls, is why you don't buy Sonos products, ever. (Or any Internet of Things that Spy On You devices.) Palindrome courtesey Sakari Maaranen.
Alexander Hamilton Church and cost accounting: Capital-Labour analysis
Alexander Hamilton Church (28 May 1866 – 11 February 1936) was an English efficiency engineer, accountant and writer on accountancy and management, known for his seminal work of management and cost accounting. In particular, it was his work which expanded the concept of factors of production from just labour to include capital and other inputs. Among his works, Production factors in cost accounting and works management (1910), from whose introduction:
From the earliest days of manufacturing there has grown up a custom of considering labor as the main and only direct item in production, and of expressing all other expenditure in more or less vague percentages of wage cost. The fact is, however, that labor, while always important, tends to become less important relatively to other items as the progress of organized manufacture develops and the use of specialized and expensive mechanical equipment increases. Very few concerns have come to grief by ignoring labor costs, but many have passed into the hands of receivers by ignoring the relative imiportance of the other factors of production.
On social media and online tools as "optional": Facebook required for AirBnB
Via The Guardian, "I didn’t have enough Facebook friends to prove to Airbnb I was real": At the other end of the Airbnb helpline in Colorado, “Casey” sounded incredulous. “You have how many Facebook friends?” she drawled. “Er … about 50,” I replied. Long pause. “Well, you don’t have enough for us to verify you. You’d need at least 100.” “But”, I squeaked, “I post every now and again … I’m on Facebook most days to check on my friends and relations.” This, however, was not enough to convince Airbnb I existed. And, as I didn’t exist, I could not book a room. Keep this in mind next time someone declares "nobody forces you to use Facebook". Despite the many other refutations of this trope, we can now respond unequivocally: "AirBnB do".
Milestones: the 900 club
Just to memorialise this, and to bury the item as I close out this thread: the Dreddit has crossed the 900 subscriber threshold for the first time. Thanks to all, again, I will strive to be worth your time. It's interesting how much I prefer not to note such things, and yet do in fact note them. The days of teetering just on the edge in particular.
Do you like what you're reading here? Would you like to see a broader discussion? Do you think there are ideas which should be shared more broadly? The Lair isn't a numbers game, my real goal is quality -- reaching, and hopefully interacting with, an intelligent online community. Something which I've found, in several decades of online interactions, difficult to achieve. But there's something which works surprisingly well: word of mouth. Shares, by others, to appropriate venues, have generated the best interactions. I do some of that, but I could use your help as well. So: if you see something that strikes you as particularly cogent (or, perhaps, insipid), please share it. To another subreddit. To Twitter or Facebook or G+. To the small-but-high-quality Metafilter. To your blogging circle, or a mailing list. If you work in technology, or policy, or economics, there as well. Thanks, Morbius.
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